Po' Kids [Written October 9th, 2017]

It wasn' rainin' but I knew that rain would soon fall from the skies. I'd gotten up early that day to help 'round the house, as usual. Mamma wouldn't be home till late and Pa', well, he was out huntin' and with all that work, with the peeling off the deer's skin and preparing the meat, well, he wouldn't have no time to help 'round the house or with my brothers. We weren't many, just Jemma and Curtis, but Curtis was as wild as ever and would always tease lil Jemma by takin' her doll away.

"Don't be nasty, Curtis," I would say taking the doll from him and handing it over to my lil sis. She thank me with those sweet big blue eyes of hers. Sweetest lil girl in the whole town. No arguing about that, no how.

"You is nasty!" Curtis would say sticking out his tongue and running off to kick something in the yard or play around with Poe, our dog.

"Po' dog! You is lost," is what Curtis said when we found him wandering near the road one day, back from buying some potatoes and drink for supper. "Poe, that's your name! You comin' home with me."

I remember Mamma wasn't too happy when we brought Poe home, she just sighed and shook her head but when she saw Jemma and Curtis' lil shiny eyes, she just couldn't say no.

"Alright," she said, "but you kids gonna have to look after him. I have no time fo' dogs."

We promised we'd be real nice and real good to Poe and we were. Poe was as happy as any dog can be. We played with him real nice, washed him down by the river when he got real stinky. He looked so shiny after all the washin' and we got ourselves cleaned up, too. We had a tub at home but the water ain't always so warm, so if it gonna be cool, better be the river, we said.

Well, that day, that day when it rained real hard in the night, we decided to play around in the yard after the chores. We was havin' a great time with Poe and Jemma and Curtis. We ran and ran, and chased after each other, and Poe after us. The sun was hot and we got to sweatin' but we decided to go for a swim later down by the river. So we got even dirtier and rolled around and let Poe's paws get our arms and hands dirty. I could always scrub them clothes real squeaky clean before Mamma got home, so she wouldn' notice and Pa' would be busy as always, sleepin' on the couch, that shiny bottle in his hands.

"Let's go to the river," Jemma said with a smile. "Tara needs a bath!" She said laughing as she held up her doll all covered in mud. We laughed and made our way towards that old dirt road that always took us straight to the river.

The wind picked up, lifted up my skirt and Jemma's dress clear up but we just laughed and ran and Curtis and Poe led the way. We were about to reach the river when I heard Poe barking and Curtis shouting. I hard gunfire and Poe yelp, I ran as fast as I could and told Jemma to stay behind me but to keep outta sight till I told her to.

There was three boys. I'd seen 'em in school but we never really talked befo' 'cause they was older and they always was gettin' in trouble. Why did we have to go to the river that day? We couldn' have we stayed home like the other days. It was gonna rain, anyhow. But we went. We went.

One of 'em was holdin' back Curtis, tears streaming down his face like mud from all the dirt, trying to keep his eyes open, his eyes were on Poe. Poe wasn' cryin' anymore. He just lay there, still, at the feet of the boy with the gun. He had a big ol' grin across his face and a huntin' rifle in his hands.

"This your big sister here?" he asked Curtis and his shiny devil eyes looked into mine. I could feel my eyes burnin', Poe was dead and that boy had done it for no reason.

"Why you shoot our dog?" I asked bravely, not caring 'bout the gun in his hands. "You had no right! No right at all! And let go my brother!"

The two boys holdin' back Curtis just laughed and the one with the gun spit and took a step toward me. "That there dog attacked me! Try to bite me he did. I hadda shoot 'im!"

"Poe wouldn' hurta fly!" cried Curtis, half choking on the tears and his runny nose. "He wouldn' hurta fly!"

"Please," I asked, noticing the boys' looking all annoyed by Curtis's cryin'. "Let my lil' brother go. We won't tell a soul. If Poe attacked ya, I believe ya. Just let us go."

The boy with the rifle took a long pause and looked at me from the tip o' my head down to my shoes. He smiled, but it was a nasty smile, not like one a boy should 'ave. I shivered and I prayed to God Jemma would stay behind, wouldn' show her face. I prayed and prayed.

"Please," I begged quietly and suddenly I didn' feel so big anymore.

The boy raised his rifle at me and I barely screamed, I gasped, I didn' wanna anger him mo', couldn' let 'im hurt Curtis or Jemma. But he didn' shoot me, instead he touched me with the tip of his gun, along my hair, along my face, down my belly and then down there.

"Stop it," I begged but he smiled even more and he didn't remove the rifle from down there.

"I'll let ya'll go home, but you gotta do somethin' for me first," he whispered with malice in my ear. "You don' wan' yo' brother to get shot, too. Right?"

My heart was apoundin' and all I could think of was Curtis and Jemma had to be safe. I had to protect 'em. Always.

I nodded my head. "I'll do what you ask, just let my brother go home."

I wish I could tell you that the story ended there, that some adult was walkin' near the river and stopped the boys an' we got home safe an' sound, but I can't. I can't lie about this. It all happened so fast that I could hardly tell what was goin' on. He touched me first in places no one ever should, places Mamma said are not to be touched or seen by other people unless you was washin' yourself at home. Curtis started to yell for help and one of the boys hit him across the face. I saw blood. I struggled to help him but the boy put his gun against my belly an' said that I tried to move, he'd shoot 'im, he'd shoot 'im dead.

"Curtis, close your eyes," I said with tears coming down my face but they felt like fire, they burned and burned my eyes. "Close your eyes, darlin'. Look away, we'll go home soon, alright?"

"No, Ella," cried Curtis, blood running from his nose. "No, we go home now! Right now!"

"You gonna tell yo' bitch of a brother to shut the hell up or do I gotta shoot 'im to shut 'im up!" yelled the boy with the gun.

"No!" I cried holdind my hands together in prayer. "Please, I promise he'll be quiet now. He'll be quiet and I'll do whateve' you want. Please."

I looked at Curtis and he looked at me. "Honey, please. Don' scream, don' look, just close your eyes."

Big ol' tears filled his eyes and rolled down his muddy cheeks as he closed them and looked away. The boys smiled wickedly and the one with the gun used one hand to pull down the top of my dress, he ripped right through it, it wasn' an expensive dress. Mamma had made it fo' me. I cried but stood quiet and still. His face was gettin' red and his smile turned twisted and strange as he touched me with his hand. I wanted to cry and scream and die all at once but he didn' stop there. I wish he had. He pushed me to the ground and I heard the boys cheer 'im on. One of 'em had let go of my brother an' had his hand down his pants, touchin' his private parts. I wanted to die.

He got down on his knees and pulled down his pants, I didn' wanna look down but he told me to or else and I saw it and I wanted to run away, I didn' wanna be there but for Curtis, I had to. He told me to touch it and I did. I didn' mean to but I felt sick to my stomach, turned my head to the side and threw up. He yelled at me.

"Filthy bitch!" he yelled as he pressed the gun against my side and his body against me. I could smell his stench, I could smell everything, the smell that came from down there an' I felt I was gonna be sick again but I couldn't do it. "Do that again and your brother's dead!"

I nodded, real quiet, and that's when everything turned to a blur. First, I felt it, I felt him pushin' himself between my legs. It hurt, it felt bad, an' wrong, and it was all the worse hearin' him enjoyin' my pain. I bit my lip and looked away but he looked for my face. He pushed in and out again and again and I cried and cried but he wouldn' stop. I closed my eyes but I opened them 'cause I heard Curtis cry out. They lied. They lied.

"No!" I cried out an' I struggled to break free but he was too heavy an' too strong and pushed himself more and more against me. It hurt bad but what I saw hurt even more. "No! Curtis, no! Let him go! Let him go!"

I saw my brother and I heard his screams. I saw the two boys forcin' 'im down to his knees, then down to the ground. They pulled his breeches down, he fought an' fought but they was bigger than him. I cried "Lord have mercy! Lord let my brother go home!" but no one came to help us, no one came to rescue him. I couldn' move, I didn' care for the blood between my legs, I cared about Curtis, I cared about him. It all turned black.

When I woke up, I couldn' stand on my two feet. I crawl' to my brother. He wasn' screamin' no more, he wasn' talkin'. "Curtis!" I said, "Curtis, wake up!" but he wouldn' wake. He just lay still, his eyes open but he just wouldn' speak. I held him close, I heard his heart beat. I never felt so happy an' sad in my life. The boys had gone, Poe lied still near the willow tree that stood over us. I felt weak, I felt empty an' cold, but we hadda get home somehow.

"Jemma?" I cried out suddenly remembering she had been there all along, hiding between the bushes. There was no reply. I put Curtis down gently and crawled towards the spot where she should be. "Please, Lord," I remembering thinking, "Please let 'er be alright." But when I got there, though she was there, I saw that she was not alright. She was sitting on the ground, her pretty little white dress all torn up and stained with dirt and dark brownish-red blotches. I swallowed but I had no spit, no air, no nothing, just cold, cold fear in my belly. She sat there, Tara by her side, her head bashed in, she wasn' the pretty doll she was befo'. "Jemma," I cried as I got closer, but she didn' look up, she looked straight ahead with a blank look in her eyes. "Jemma, darlin'." She only whispered, "Poe. Po' Poe, po' Poe." As I got closer I saw it, I saw somethin' I ain't never thought I would see in my life. Her little hands, her tiny little hands with her lil fingers all red an' covered in dirt were diggin' into the dirt, diggin' and gatherin' dirt in fron' of her spread little legs, her ripped bloodstained dress, and she was pushin' the dirt in between them. Pushin' hard and pushin' all the dirt inside her lil self. "Jemma, no!" I screamed as I stopped her little hands from pushin' any more dirt in. I cried so hard as I held her close. Was she also feelin' pain inside? Was she also feelin' numb? "Oh, sweet Jesus!" I said holdin' her tight. She cried an' in her sweet lil voice she cried, "Poe, po' Poe."

"Poe," I said as I stroked her hair, not minding the blood stains on my dress, not minding the pain inside.

Po' Poe, po' kids. Why ain't nobody lookin' after us po' kids?